On a “Break” but his Ex-Girl is Pregnant

Dear Mrs Vito,

I had been with my boyfriend for under a year, things were good for a while until we hit a rocky period which resulted in us taking a break in our relationship. During that break he got his Ex-girlfriend pregnant and I found out from a mutual friend. I love him but I cant believe he slept with his Ex and she’s pregnant.

Dear Anon,

I usually say that if you have a “break” in your relationship, it is probably for a good reason. Now its not to say that things can’t be worked out, but that is only when you have two willing participants and from the sounds of things, your ex-boyfriend already found another way to occupy his time.

Obviously, there could be 100 reasons that lead to him and his ex girlfriend being in the same bed, but it doesn’t feel like you were at the forefront of his mind.
Some may say, what happens on a break is irrelevant, as you are now “single” again, and they have a fair point.

So my question is, what are you happy to deal with or compromise on? If you don’t mind the current set up then by all means get back together.
Try talking to him and see what he has to say, maybe he isn’t interested in getting back with you, maybe to him this situation is nothing serious.

I would encourage you to think about what kind of relationship you want. If this bothers you then cut your losses and focus on a man who is going to appreciate you.

Mrs Vito

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2 thoughts on “On a “Break” but his Ex-Girl is Pregnant

  1. 100% agree Mrs Vito. For him to return back to his ex on a break…hmmmm I have a feeling that communication never really ceased ‘on that level’ between them to be honest. This in turn could breed an air of insecurity and distrust if you were to get back in a relationship with him… I dunno, I couldn’t get back with him personally – I’d always think (in the back of my mind) he’d run to her if things between us turned sour..

    • There were so many red flags!
      Rightly said to return to or find yourself vulnerable enough to be in the arms of your Ex is concerning. Of course if you then get back together with him in such a situation could you trust him? Especially as a child brings people together & he will always have contact with her. I never really sensed the guy was trying to make things work with his “current” girlfriend.
      Precisely, If we find ourselves plagued with questions around his behaviour & trust and there’s no reassurance, cut your losses!

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