Transitioning and navigating from single-hood to a relationship, especially when you know it’s a serious relationship can be hard.
Ideally at this time you want your friends and family to get on with your chosen guy/girl. But what if they don’t?
I personally picked a guy that truly challenged my perceptions, norms and comfort zone. In my opinion to an extreme, except he wasn’t an extremist. Because, if I’m harsh with myself I was ok with playing it safe.
Of course I had goals, ambitions and was driven. Yet not being a huge risk taker meant I often stayed within my comfort zone.
Never one to start a fight, or unsettle a situation. He definitely instilled more confidence in me to stand up for myself, voice my opinion and make a change.
From the outside this can easily be viewed as someone changing, or that they are not being themselves. But what if it was always in them? Just that no one had taken the time to empower, encourage, affirm or build them?
It’s great when people generally support, challenge and typically want the best for each other, lifting each other to higher standards.
We are called “not to conform to the world” but to be “transformed by the renewing of our minds”, my then boyfriend and now husband was certainly trying to get me to challenge my understanding of conforming and renewing. Our conversations were geared towards uprooting negative thought patterns and in their place planting God’s word. Provoking growth in me, personal development and encouraging my relationship with God. Yet it worked both ways, I too was challenging his perspectives, advising him on how to be a better person, seeing the greatness in him and encouraging it.
Sometimes going through such a process may be uncomfortable, you may lose and gain friends. But know that walking, thinking and actualising God’s plan for your life may go against the grain, of everything you think you’ve always known.
“And do not be conformed to this world [any longer with its superficial values and customs], but be transformed and progressively changed [as you mature spiritually] by the renewing of your mind [focusing on godly values and ethical attitudes], so that you may prove [for yourselves] what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect [in His plan and purpose for you]” Romans 12 v 2 Amplified Bible (AMP)