4 Things Attractive People Can Do Whilst They Wait for Love

single and waitingI have previously shared my thoughts on what to do when you’ve come out of a long term Relationship or have experienced a Break up. Generally I advise that you evaluate what happened and what went wrong, so that you can work on Developing yourself for the next Right Relationship.

Lets be real, after a Break-up, whilst your trying really hard to ‘Focus’ on you, embracing being single, re-educating yourself on expectations of Men, Women & Relationships. You WILL be approached by Interested parties, you WILL attract people, you may even be asked out….. Its inevitable, because you’re a beautiful, handsome, intelligent & loving person…. I could go on!

The Question is – How to do you handle this attention?… Especially if you’re not really ready to commit or you are being approached by the wrong people.

Well, I encourage you to read my Husbands post  –  4 Things Attractive People Can Do With Their Beauty.

First Date Deal Breaker


“You have an amazing evening with a handsome, intelligent man, the date goes really really well…and then at the END he invites you back to his place for sex. 1st date! Do you dismiss him ? Even though he apologizes and states that sex on the 1st date is what a lot of women do these days after an expensive night on the town, but he is GLAD that you’re different and wants to see you again????”

Regardless of how Handsome or Intelligent the Man is, an invitation for Sex on the First Date is way too far.

Caution: If Sex on the first date is what other girls offer, how many girls has he taken up on this offer?

Seeing this Man again will depend on what you place an importance on. What do you value most? Are you bothered by what you’ve just been asked? How much Respect do you place on your self / on your body? Does he have the right to sample something he hasn’t made a ring sacrifice for? – All I know is that I would be offended.

As a Virtuous Woman, who wants to be Loved by the Right Man if you know you deserve more and To be honest if he is ‘GLAD’ that you are different, then he will appreciate your decline and/or serious talking to.

If in fact you declined & explained that you were not interested and were put off by his request, would he be willing to still show interest in you and continue Courting you?

There’s no harm in continuing your dates, but only with clear guidelines that there will be no sex before marriage, you need to be realistic, consciously or unconsciously he has put a disclaimer out there ‘I’m interested in Sex’. Question is how many ‘Expensive’ dates will you take before you ‘give it up?’. To me it sounds as if He knows the right things to say.

Do not be enticed or seduced by money, flashy, shiny, expensive, designer things – you will find yourself enslaved to it!

Would it make a difference if I said Don’t fall in to that trap, start as you mean to go on & that’s with a Faithful, Confident, Loving and Respectful Man where you’re both aiming for a Monogamous Relationship.

Place a higher value on a persons Character, don’t get it twisted, every one has control over what they say & every one is aware of what they say. So for him to think a simple apology is good enough to pacify your concern is unacceptable. He knew what he was asking and decided to take a risk in asking it.

Guard your Heart!


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Love & Blessings


Rome wasn’t built in a Day & neither is a Wife

{“Rome wasn’t built in a Day & neither is a Wife” – @MrVitoSpeaks}

Are you Single? Are you in a Relationship? Do you want to move from the Relationship you have to the Right kind of Relationship?

I believe that people should be in the Right kind of Relationships…..

This is were you consciously declare and make the decision (despite your past) that the Next Relationship you get in to will be the Right one. This is done by actively choosing to change any negative behaviour, thought process, false expectations, and a commit to actually having and maintaining Self Respect. I definitely had to do it and it is often said that “insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result” and I didn’t want to make the same mistakes nor did I want a ‘Go with the flow’ Relationship.

After my last Relationship breakup I went on a Journey and it took me back to the Basics!

The Break-Up

If you are just coming out of a Relationship (Long Term/ Short Term/ Casual etc)  its wise to take a breather and focus on you. Take time out to get to know You again. Most times you would have invested a lot of time with this other person, going out, participating in their hobbies, their habits, principles, thoughts and behaviours.

It’s easy for someone to rub off on you – You really need to re-assess whether the thoughts your thinking are even yours!

A New Focus

In order to get rid of your Old Behaviour and Tainted perceptions of Love, its time to Focus on Developing yourself. Making a consistent effort at being the Best Woman you can be. I recommend updating your library with good books on Relationships, Purpose and Team-work. Exercise your mind, find out what your hobbies are again and do them, go out, re-connect with friends, re-activate your social life, where applicable focus on your faith and spend time alone.

Hearts Rebuilding Homes logo

Time To Work Out What You What

– (With or without a guy) Where do you see yourself?

– What are your Aims, Goals, Dreams?

– Develop your thoughts around sober Self-Confidence and the value of others.

– Build your Self Esteem (So that you don’t find yourself Needing the compliments of Guys to Survive)

Reflective Thought

Analyse your past Relationships honestly, what went wrong?

They say “Hindsight is always 20/20” so utilise that vision to fish out your approach, accept your regrets, forgive yourself and the other person and move on.

Remember to think about the things you need to improve on for your future connection.

When you begin to work through these things you can Start (key word Start) to work on building a wholesome person. I found that as I Invested in my Self & my Development I was genuinely Happy, and no one could take that from me, people could only add to my Happiness. I saw things differently, I was able to tackle things differently, I was in a better place to work out whether or not I was Ready or Even Interested in getting into another Relationship.


Please feel free to subscribe and leave your comments. For Learning Engagements, Problems & Personal Development Enquiries send your emails to;


Love & Blessings