Start As You Mean To Go On

Even though January is almost over, we can still set the tone for your life this year (and hopefully the years to come).

blank list of resolutions on blackboard

However, this isn’t another New Years Resolution!.. Ooooh No… This is more like a commitment to Personal Development.

(Most) People have good intentions, vowing to become better by drawing up a list of activities to resolve i.e;

– I will quit smoking
– I will join a gym
– I will become a vegetarian
– I will quit my boring job
– I will pray more
– I will pay off my credit cards/debts

It all reminds me of those ‘quick fix’ diets… I have this image of someone scrambling around to list all the things they need to change, preferably really quickly, yet never really getting round to doing them or keeping to them… Or is that just my imagination?

Quick Fix:
~ A hastily contrived remedy that alleviates a problem only for the time being
~ An expedient temporary solution, esp. one that merely postpones coping with an overall problem. (thefreedictionary.com)

For example, those that aim to lose weight fast, might start dieting and give themselves a target to reach i.e in 2 weeks for a sunny holiday. Sometimes they reach the target, go on holiday, are extremely happy and upon returning the diets out the window, they resort to how things used to be.

So the diet ends up being a temporary vice. This might be a silly question, but I pose that instead of ‘quick fix dieting’ shouldn’t we just alter our eating habits, lifestyle, the way we view food, what we buy and increase our knowledge on what’s in the meal??

Wouldn’t this have a lasting effect on steady, healthy weight loss, which can be maintained for life?

Well, the same applies to you becoming a better person in regards to Self Improvement and Personal Development.

‘Start as you mean to go on’ is me basically daring you to do things differently this time round. Instead of ‘New Years Resolutions’ aim to Live a Purposeful Life of Personal Development.

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Get organised and prepared by following the below Steps to help kick-start your Journey:

  1. Take time out to really assess what personal skills you need to develop, improve on, change  or issues you need to resolve.
  2. Look for Seminars, Events, Courses that you can attend to help re-educate yourself about the area/issue.
  3. Buy a book or two around that subject, area or issue. As learning is a lifelong process.
  4. Sign yourself up for Counselling to help deal with unresolved issues that will and can affect your future self.
  5. Look for a Mentor to help encourage your new skill, or help you on your journey.
  6. Make sure the friends you keep are there to help, encourage and keep you accountable on your personal development.
  7. Buy a notebook, I’m sure you’ll need to write something down.
  8. Let me know how you get on and /or contact me for any advice/support.

(Feel free to check out my ‘Mentoring Services’ Page)

xoxo

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For Learning Engagements, Problems & Personal Development Enquiries send your emails to; Info.fybconnection@gmail.com

Love & Blessings

@Lolasword

…You Don’t Love Me Part 2 “I’ll do anything you say boy”

Following on from my post – ‘No no no You Don’t Love Me’, we continue to compare the song by Dawn Penn to real life.

*NB: The below comparison is based on the premise that one person in the relationship has done something wrong whilst the other person has been ‘good’ to them.

Manipulation.

2) “I’ll do anything you say boy” (Some lyric sites say – “I’ll do anything to stay boy”)

OK, so I don’t know what the “boy” has done to get her to the realisation that he doesn’t love her any more (he could have cheated or he could have just told her that he doesn’t love her? – The possibilities are endless).

In my opinion, if I now realise that someone doesn’t love me any more despite my efforts, love & time. I don’t really want to stick around. I also wouldn’t really want to do “anything you say”, why should I?… You don’t love me any more!

If as a result of my inappropriate behaviour, actions, disrespect, constant name calling, foul mouth, inappropriate dress, poor attitude etc someone stopped loving me, then I’d understand. As they have reached a tether, the patience has worn out and the ‘love is gone’, so it would make more sense in such situation, if I were to say “I’ll do anything you say”.

However I still don’t condone it, because change starts from within & if some one really wanted to change they would have. You can’t make someone else change.

My husband always says “Don’t reward bad behaviour with Dedication”

And its True.

They say that there are tell-tale signs when a relationship is over. Some signs may have been there from the start, but if due to ‘Rose Tinted Glasses’ or being on ‘Cloud 9’, you didn’t see them (aka tell-tale signs); they can look something like this:

  • A decrease in or non-existent communication
  • A decrease in or no time spent together
  • Lack of interest in the other person, decrease in closeness
  • Continuous arguments with no aim for a solution
  • No commitment made to current or future plans together
  • Unfaithfulness; emotionally, physically, getting intimate with other girls/guys
  • Being left out of their plans.. “We becomes I”
  • Increase in Disrespect displayed
  • Only time spent together is to be intimate or there is no intimacy

In many situations I’ve seen people giving all their might to make an unhealthy relationship work, when they should be working on leaving. Yet the reality is that there are several reasons why some don’t (immediately) leave an unhealthy relationship, including (not limited to):

  • Low self-esteem & low confidence
  • Love; believing the other person may change
  • Thinking you’ll never meet any one better
  • Fear
  • Pressure; Peers, Family, Children
  • Dependency on that person for; money, shelter, etc
  • Experience; being only exposed to this type of relationship, this is all you know
  • Up-bringing, it’s how you saw relationships modelled in your family
  • Seeing this as normality

Whatever situation you currently find yourself in, make sure you are genuinely happy, are there by choice and are being treated well!

xoxo

Please feel free to subscribe and leave your comments.

For Learning Engagements, Problems & Personal Development Enquiries send your emails to; Info.fybconnection@gmail.com

Love & Blessings

@Lolasword

Edited Beauty

(Dove Evolution) This isn’t the only type of Video out there, but I thought that it and many others were apt in addressing some of the issues we see in society today. It’s still shocking to see the unrealistic, shallow, stereotypical changes that pictures go through. I work with many young girls and know a […]